Tuesday, January 29, 2008

the boy who loved too much


maybe you remember that t2 had a hitting problem a while back. he was getting hitting and hello mixed up and everytime he wanted to say hi to another kid he'd swat at them. he'd also hit when he was frustrated, but that was less often. we combated that issue with the old adage 'hug, don't hit' (see also, 'don't cry, try') and spent a good number of weeks showing him what we meant.
so here's what he does now: he sees another kid that he's interested in. he watches that kid for a little while. he usually does some kind of dance or a few little prances to get that kid's attention. when that doesn't work, he engulfs them in a hug, usually knocking them over. occasionally the hug is followed by a huge, slimy open mouth kiss.
he's also been known to do this to adults. and to a lesser degree, things (see kissy flower pic above). nothing's safe.
how's that for a turn around?
thing is, most kids don't like to be swallowed in a hug by another toddler. the other thing is that he isn't particularly discriminating about what size kid he chooses to "love." last week it was a still crawling baby girl. yesterday it was a boy his who was his age but who was quite a bit bigger and heismaned him.
i try to run interference when i see he's got his love face on, but i don't always get there in time. when he makes a move, he does it fast (like his dad).
i was talking to a friend about this last week - kinda laughing about it, really. she's a bit older, with a 9 year old boy, and she said when her son was 1 1/2 - 2 he'd excitedly run up to other kids and shove them over. then he'd look bewildered and hurt when they started crying.
she told me what so many other moms have - "it's just boys." they're so physical and not armed with the language skills girls have at a young age. that doesn't make them any less excited to see and meet new people, though, so they just do it the best way they know how. brute force. HI, I LIKE YOU. WHAM! LET'S BE FRIENDS!
that makes sense. little t only has about 5 solid words in his arsenal and hi isn't one of them (though he does wave). and like most boys, he's physical. he gets a huge kick out of flopping himself on the floor, bonking things on his head (or his head on things) and jumping on or off anything.
we name everything we see, talk to him constantly, read to him, sing to him, expose him to other kids who talk and though he understands most everything we say, few real words have crossed his lips. i can't help but think someday soon his little head is going to explode if he doesn't start spewing some of that knowledge he's storing.
until then, i guess i'll keep running interference, replacing 'hug, don't hit' with 'hey hey little lover. don't smother.'

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

This hugging thing is not going to go over well when he competes for the Ultimate Fighting Championship